New Journal: Interrupt the Continuity of Illusory Vision 「停頓世界」
2004/02/14
05:22PM
2009/02/16 Mon, cloudy, indoor 21.6°C 新版《夢瑜珈》：The Illusory Body
我發覺偶爾我作夢可以說出弦外之音，那不是插播而是一種直接的瞭解，事實上我在辦公室沒有辦法回憶起來，我只能記得夢本身，弦外之音則是一點都不記得，所以我也無法說些什麼，一直要等我回來聽錄音，才會知道我說了這些話。意思是說，即便作夢的了解也很當下。就好像艾克哈特鐸利說的：「當你臨在，當你全然而深刻地專注在當下的時候，本體（being）才能被感覺到。」（《當下的力量》pp. 38-39）夢的覺知也是如此。
今天來摘較短的幻身：The Illusory Body。幻身是潛獵者要練就的，但稍微是做夢者「博士後研究」——不是啦，做夢者的白晝練習部分。
To develop the illusory body, it is necessary to have experience based upon dream practice. To proceed during the daytime, because appearances and all outer and inner phenomena, which arise like diverse reflections in a mirror, are nothing more than radiant manifestations of emptiness which have no intrinsic self-nature 自性, there is nothing one should consider to really exist. By means of an undistracted intention which considers that all inanimate and animate phenomena are manifestations of illusion or reflection. (Dream Yoga, p. 87)
藏密跟唐望巫士其實差不多，卡斯塔尼達最後一本書 Magical Passes（1998）我戲稱巫術拳法，跟南開諾布的 Yantra Yoga: The Tibetan Yoga of Movement 幻輪瑜伽，都是體操書，為什麼呢？有健全的身體才有轉化身心靈的可能，身體的能量必須直接拿來使用，如果身體積弱不振，時間都耗在這個痛那個痛，如何能修行呢？
但幻身的訓練主要是針對中陰幻身，南開諾布對幻身瑜伽並沒著墨太多，有一部電影韓國《空屋情人》倒是將幻身成就說得很清楚：
Ultimately, one is able to experience with certainty that nothing exists in truth. Similarly, one understands that self and other, enemy and friend, food and clothes, pleasant and unpleasant, joy and sorrow, attachment and aversion—whatever phenomenon of samsara 輪迴 or nirvana 涅槃, whatever is perceived, whatever manifests—in the very moment of their manifestation have no essence, like a reflection in a mirror. (Dream Yoga, pp. 87-88)
南開諾布說一旦視一切如幻顯象為非真實（non-reality）的信念成為個人生命之流的全部（become perfected in one's life-stream），我們的身體便能經驗到幻身（one's own body is thus experienced as an illusory body），而且豪無困難的，一個人即能夠認證中陰幻身（the illusory body of the bardo）（p. 88）。睡前瞭解所有顯象皆是夢，所有宇宙中無生命與有生命的現象都具有如夢的本質，所有看似堅實的顯現都無異於幻夢，南開諾布說：「When one is able to manifest like this inside a dream, one becomes free of attachment ot any phenomenon which manifests anywhere.」（p. 88）
Practicing like this day and night, one is not attached to delusive manifestations as reality, one's body manifests like a kind of immaterial shadow, and one is able to see its non-existence. One's body does not cast a shadow, one is able to recognize the illusory body of the bardo, and one's rebirth in the future will be exalted 停止. (Dream Yoga, p. 88)
註解說：「One practices with illusory body dreams. Perfecting this, one's physical body manifests like a kind of shadow. And because of this, the body in the bardo is recognized to be oneself.」（p. 88）在中陰時認證自身即為幻身，這個我不太懂。
2009/02/17 Tue, cloudy, indoor 21.9°C 《當下的力量》：「觀察思考者」；把注意力引導到當下
回到《當下的力量》，有個練習目前可以多做：
開始儘可能地傾聽你腦袋裡的聲音，特別注意任何一再重覆的 思考模式。我說「觀察思考者」正是這個意思。傾聽它，觀察它，這個對我是的體會，這個對你自己臨在的感知不是一個思想，它源自於心智之外。
一個新的向度進來了，在你傾聽思想的同時，你感覺到一個意識的臨在，思想隨即喪失了掌控你的力量，而急速地止息。
當一個思想止息的時候，你經驗到一個心智流的中斷——一個「無—心」的間隙。這個間隙一開始很短，可是它會逐漸延長。
當你更深入這個被東方稱之為「無—心」的境域時，你就體會到純意識的狀態了。你所有的思考、情感、你的肉體和外在的世界，相較之下變得無足輕重了。這是一個無我的狀態，它把你帶到一個超越過去你所認為的「你的自我」的境界。
你除了使用「觀察思考者」的方式之外，也可以把注意力引導到當下，來創造一個心智流的間隙。你只要深刻地意識到當下這一刻就可以了。這是一個有深度滿足感的修習。你憑著這種方式，把意識由心智的活動上引開，而創造了一個「無—心」的間隙。你在這個間隙裡，處於高度的機警和覺知之中，卻沒有思考，這就是冥想的精髓。（pp. 46-49）
最後面這段是我要練習的，這其實跟南開諾布講的一樣，並不難，就是隨時記得自己、觀察自己在做什麼，全方位五官五感的觀察。我們如果還陷在目前這樣的心智思考漩渦裡，對我們並沒有任何益處。
2009/02/18 Wed, cloudy, indoor 22.6°C 《日與夜的循環》：The Practice of the Night
昨晚 Gulubee 寫來：
I'm reading this:http://www.prismagems.com/castaneda/donjuan4.html
Someone is keeping notes from all Castaneta's works. And actually I'm reading the Chinese version for the Tales of power, for about 2/3 part now, but at the same time I'm browsing this English version, though it's summarized, I've found this note that's reflecting the topic of Compassion and coldness I was talking with you.
So, now I know deeper about "Compassion." The below is the text that I copied from the website:
Tales of power
I am going to disclose to you a warrior's secret.. Perhaps you can call it a warrior's predilection 偏愛. The life of a warrior cannot possibly be cold and lonely and without feelings because it is based on his affection, his devotion, his dedication to his beloved. And who, you ask, is his beloved? I will show you now.
His love is the world. He embraces this enormous earth. The earth knows that he loves it and it bestows on him its care. That's why his life is filled to the brim and his state, wherever he'll be, will be plentiful. He roams on the paths of his love and, wherever he is, he is complete.
This is the predilection of a warrior. This earth, this world. For a warrior there can be no greater love. Only if one loves this earth with unbending passion can one release one's sadness. A warrior is always joyful because his love is unalterable and his beloved, the earth, embraces him and bestows upon him inconceivable gifts. The sadness belongs only to those who hate the very thing that gives shelter to their beings.
This lovely being, which is alive to its last recesses and understands every feeling, soothed me, it cured me of my pains, and finally when I had fully understood my love for it, it taught me freedom.
Listen to that dog's barking. That is the way my beloved earth is helping me now to bring this last point to you. That barking is the saddest thing one can hear.
That dog's barking is the nocturnal voice of a man. It comes from a house in that valley towards the south. A man is shouting through his dog, since they are companion slaves for life, his sadness, his boredom. He's begging his death to come and release him from the dull and dreary chains of his life.
That barking, and the loneliness it creates, speaks of the feelings of men, men for whom an entire life was like one Sunday afternoon, an afternoon which was not altogether miserable, but rather hot and dull and uncomfortable. They sweated and fussed a great deal. They didn't know where to go, or what to do. That afternoon left them only with the memory of petty annoyances and tedium, and then suddenly it was over; it was already night.
The antidote that kills that poison is here; this earth. The sorcerers' explanation cannot at all liberate the spirit. Look at yourself, you have gotten to the sorcerers' explanation, but it doesn't make any difference that you know it. You're more alone than ever, because without an unwavering love for the being that gives you shelter, aloneness is loneliness.
Only the love for this splendorous being can give freedom to a warrior's spirit; and freedom is joy, efficiency, and abandon in the face of any odds.
這裡說的是《力量的傳奇》最後一章，兩個戰士的偏愛。
他特別看著我說，有一次我抱怨說戰士的生活冰冷寂寞、缺乏感情，他說甚至現在我都仍舊相信如此。
「戰士的生活不可能是冰冷寂寞、缺乏感情的，」他說，「因為他的生活是建立在他對他所愛付出的熱情與奉獻上。你也許會問戰士所愛的是什麼？我現在就示範給你們看。」
結果唐哲那羅用滑行的姿勢擁抱這個巨大的地球：
「哲那羅熱愛的是這個世界，」他說，「他剛才是在擁抱這個龐大的地球，但是他太小了，因此他只能在上面滑行。但地球知道哲那羅愛它，於是它會照顧哲那羅，因此哲那羅的生命是豐盛的。不論他在什麼地方，他都不會感到有所缺乏。哲那羅漫遊在他所熱愛的路途上，不論他到何處，他都是完滿的。
唐望蹲在我們面前，輕撫著地面。「這就是兩個戰士的最深偏愛，」他說，「這個地球，這個世界。對於戰士而言，沒有比這更偉大的愛了。」
現在我讀懂 Gulubee highlight 的內容了，「沒有對眾生堅定不移的愛作為庇護，寂寞只是寂寞」。
資深佛友說我習慣有非人格的禪修對象，或者唐望巫士們也不習慣稱眾生，the being 是一切存有，包括地球，所以他們用非特定人格的地球來代表一切依附於而存在的生物，愛地球即代表這一切。
《日與夜的循環》讀到夜的練習部分，這部份需要睡前及醒後來做。簡單說就是利用觀想集中注意力於一點，接著放鬆，進入夢鄉。南開諾布說是因為停不下來的思想讓我們失眠，將心專注於一點卻是很容易入眠的。差別在於維持這樣等同禪定的止的練習入睡，在夢還沒生起時，我們會容易經驗到自然淨光（natural Clear Light），因為專注於一點將停止內在對話（散漫思想），先止再睡，不僅接著的夢可以較少業力軌跡的夢，且容易有清明夢，可能是散漫思想（日有所思）在這已經先建立一個心智斷流的關係。早上我有觀想心間
阿字，是不是清明夢之前，我不記得了。How do we do this? Just before falling asleep, visualize a white letter A or a small round bead of five-colored rainbow light in the space between our eyebrows. In the Dzogchen Upadesa, this letter or a tiny sphere of white light is visualized in the heart center because visualizing it between the eyebrows gives a sense of too much presence and one may not be able to fall asleep. But here we visualize it in the forehead center because this gives automatic control of all our vital energies or prana 氣. If we should succeed in visualizing this five-colored bindo (tigle 明點) , this is very good for realizing control over the elements (The Cycle of Day and Night, pp. 83-84)
Chuck 曾在夢報告寫到睡前觀想眉心明點，接著感覺非常明亮如白天。我選心間阿（或 A），大如豌豆，隨時觀心間阿，可以將注意力收攝回來，並且出體時集中注意力於心輪還可以收攝法界能量。
We will get caught up in these thoughts and sleep will to come right away. But if we continue in the presence of a relaxed state, sleep will come easily. This means that we have integrated this pure presence with sleep and this is called the natural Clear Light. Then we will find ourselves in the presence of the real condition of existence, the Dharmata, undistracted by discursive thoughts. (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 84)
畫線部分在本文中一直重複出現，中文意思是「臨在於存在的真實情況」——也就是 Dharmata
，法性。今天來不及摘南開諾布講人為何要睡覺，意思也是要自然回返「臨在於存在的真實情況」，這段期間很短，差不多剛入睡到夢起來之間，因為這時可以擺脫物質世界，且不受散漫思想所縛。
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2009/02/19 Thur, cloudy, indoor 23.1°C 《日與夜的循環》：入睡是要讓我們回到「真實存在狀態」之「明性」
睡前靈機一現，拿出
詹杜固仁波切在吉隆坡的佛法中心送我的英文小冊子，達賴喇嘛的 The Essence of Happiness: A Guidebook for living，每頁少少的字，一下就看完 Part I: The Purpose of Life。我既沒畫線現在也不記得多少，但想必是好多了。達賴喇嘛要我們分別 happiness 跟 pleasure 的不同，我想 pleasure 應該翻愉悅——特別是感官的愉悅，差不多是「肉體上的快樂」，我摘這段就好：Now sometimes people confuse happiness with pleasure... from my point of view, the highest happiness is when one reaches the stage of Liberation 解脫, at which there is no more suffering. True happiness relates more to the mind and heart. Happiness that depends mainly on physical pleasure is unstable; one day it's there, the next day it may not be. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 20)
再摘一段，快樂四部曲：
Although it is possible to achieve happiness, happiness is not a simple thing. There are many levels. In Buddhism, for instance, there is a reference to the four factors of fulfillment, or happiness: wealth, worldly satisfaction, spirituality and enlightenment. Together they embrace the totality of an individual's quest for happiness. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 8)
達賴喇嘛的智慧真的是沒話講，比我看一堆書都幫助大。我在第三部曲，這生離證悟相當遠，但顯然財富跟世俗成就不能讓我快樂，這是在於快樂的主管機關的不同。說到這又要摘一段，為什麼呢？讓心快樂或滿足的心的定義有所不同故：
When I say 'training the mind,' in this context I'm not referring to 'mind' merely as one's cognitive ability or intellect. Rather, I'm using the term in the sense of the Tibetan word Sem, which has a much broader meaning, closer to 'psyche' or 'spirit'; it includes intellect and feeling, heart and mind. By bringing about a certain inner discipline, we can undergo a transformation of our attitude, our entire outlook and approach to living. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 10)
所以目前情況我希望能學習達賴喇嘛說的，正向思考的人快樂較多，負向思考的人快樂較少。昨天說要摘人為何要睡覺，南開諾布仁波切如此說：
The process of falling asleep is itself the cause of our being able to enter into the clarity of the real condition of existence. The functioning of all our senses, in a state of presence, finds itself absorbed entirely into the Dharmadhatu. Until we have fallen asleep entirely, we can find ourselves present in that state of contemplation. (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 85)
Dharmadhatu 不知道又是什麼？不過我查《大藥》一書的「詞彙解釋」，Dharmata 是法性：「真如，現象的究竟自性，空性」。入睡是要讓我們回到「真實存在狀態」之「明性」（clarity），這我有點不明，為什麼不是回到「真實存在狀態」就好，還要多個「明性」？需要藉由雪謙冉江仁波切的話來解釋一下，他說：「佛性其自性為空，其展現為明。佛性是一種了悟的狀態，而不是本來就具有實體的本體。它離於『存在』與『不存在』的概念。它不是一個永恆的本體。」（《大藥》p. 99）所以《當下的力量》 the being 翻成「本體」也不對，應該差不多是 the real condition of existence。
如果我們將「真實存在狀態」理解成「空」，「真實存在狀態之明性」理解為「顯」（顯象），似乎便合於顯空雙運的「空為自性，明為展現」（p. 99），也是這裡說的「心的本體」及「所有心之活動和戲論（elaborations）」（p. 98）。至於上段說的也就是藉入睡回到「真實存在狀態」——也就是心之本體——的空性展現，所以做夢當然是心之本體之活動，以資深佛友的話簡言之：夢是明體所現。南開諾布解釋如下：
When we fall asleep, we become disengaged from the karmic traces of the material body, the karmic traces of vision, and the karmic traces of mental functioning. These karmic traces, during the waking state, manifest as our material body, the external appearances which we perceive, and the functioning of our minds, respectively. Why do we speak of being disengaged? For example, the solid walls of a room present material limitations. We cannot pass freely through them. But when we are present in the state of Rigpa, then we are not conditioned by the material body. When we are present in this state, there is a way to overcome these limitations and we find ourselves in the real condition of existence. How is this? From one's falling asleep right up to the moment when we begin to dream, there is no functioning of the mind and we find ourselves in the presence of the real condition of existence. (The Cycle of Day and Night, pp. 85-86)
這個「falling asleep right up to the moment when we begin to dream」差不多等同於現實
監控程式倒數計時到零，我們如果保持覺知並按下登出「醒時」，就可進入 Rigpa 的無心智作用的本初覺知狀態。厲害吧？！
2009/02/20 Fri, cloudy, indoor 20.9°C the idealization of this romantic love can be seen as an extreme
達賴喇嘛說我們應該想著跟每位接觸的人的共通點，而不要老想著差異處，這樣比較容易溝通，他說：「We can learn to respect others' views and others' rights.」（p. 39）。
I look at any human being from a more positive angle; I try to look for their positive aspects. This attitude immediately create a feeling of affinity, a kind of connectedness. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 40)
My basic belief is that you first need to realize the usefulness of compassion. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 42)
李連杰跟智利說十年後我們還有激情就結婚，李連杰是睿智的，不然都是一時的浪漫迷幻。達賴喇嘛認為在許多情況裡人們都希望其他人先正面對待自己，而非自己先創造那種可能性，所以大部分的情愛關係都是我愛你但你要愛我回來（love me back）。
I think that if one is seeking to build a truly satisfying relationship, the best way of bringing this about is to get to know the deeper nature of the person and relate to her or him on that level. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 48)
但達賴喇嘛顯然不苟同世俗情愛，這是裡面我唯一不認同的部分，我認為愛情也可以轉化心靈，要救度眾不能當他們都是和尚跟尼姑：
I think that, leaving aside how the endless pursuit of romantic love may affect our deeper spiritual growth, even from the perspective of a conventional way of life, the idealization of this romantic love can be seen as an extreme. Unlike those relationships based on caring and genuine affection, this is based on fantasy, unattainable, and therefore may be a source of frustration. So, on that basis it cannot be seen as a positive thing. (The Essence of Happiness, p. 49)
接著這後面達賴喇嘛談及大愛，要我們學習慈悲，他說：「My basic belief is that you first need to realise the usefulness of compassion.」（p. 42）但如果我能做到慈悲，何妨有 romantic love 呢？這又不是忠孝不能兩全的事。好了，Part II 摘完了。但後面大篇幅的慈悲我都還沒同理心，我知道那是什麼，但還沒有真實的感受生起。
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2009/02/21 Sat, cloudy/sunny, indoor 20.3°C 《日與夜的循環》：interrupt the continuity of illusory vision；「停頓世界」
我們來說說南開諾布怎麼說夢修。在最後倒數第三節 The Benefits of the Practice。南開諾布說只要我們日與夜同樣以此方法練習，我們生活上的所有層面都會進入禪修。然後修行者的能力將會發展出來，且當我們更加熟悉此道時，我們的 passions 將轉為對修道有用的面向，更有甚者，我們益發能三身（Trikaya）——the three dimensions of one's existence——幫助他人。這好比說，上次我在夢裡夢到一千多隻貓被非法逮捕，我也是為了營救自己的貓，跑去交涉。也好比說，我出現困境，其他人或上師來到我夢中幫助我一樣。人的存在層面不限於肉體物質層次。
The degree to which we become familiar with the practice can be measured by the extent of our control over the dream state, recognizing our dreams to be dreams while still sleeping.
Because primal awareness is present, all appearances arise as friends who can help one on the path. In fact, everything encountered along the path can now be something utilized to help develop our practice. Therefore, we can interrupt the continuity of illusory vision and we find ourselves in the state of the Dharmata 法性, the real condition of existence. (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 90)
這除了跟艾克哈特鐸利說的「心智流的中斷」一樣，這是起步，中斷的時間會越來越長，最終達到唐望說的「停頓世界」。《巫士唐望的世界》，魯宓譯序寫到：「戰士的內在思維暫停後，日常世界的真實描述與巫術世界的奇妙描述都同時停止作用，於是戰士終於能够擺脫言語描述，達到『停頓世界』的狀態。」（p. 37）可是他說「停頓世界」是意識自由的最初步、體驗實相的先決條件，「看見」才能發生。所以說停頓世界是起步，中斷心智流則是熱身而已。
「停頓世界」(stopping the world)是「看見」的第一步。幾年來，我一直把「停頓世界」的觀念看作是沒有任何意義的神秘隱喻，直到學習快要結束時的一次正式談話中，才完全瞭解到這個觀念在唐望知識體系中所占有的重要地位。
「如果你想停頓和你一起的人，你必須站在施壓圈外，那樣才可以控制壓力。」
唐望表示要達到「看見」，首先必須「停頓世界」。「停頓世界」的確是某些知覺狀態的適當處理。使日常生活的現實發生改變，在這些狀態中，日常生活的真實已經改變了，因爲平時持續不斷的詮釋被另一套陌生的情况所停頓了。就我的例子來說，與我平常詮釋不同的陌生情况，便是巫術對世界的描述。唐望「停頓世界」的先决條件是人必須先心服；換句話說，必須學會新的描述，好用來和舊描述對抗，那樣才能打破我們所共同持有的，對于知覺或者說世界的現實不加懷疑的武斷信念。
「停頓世界」之後的下一步是「看見」。唐望對于這個觀念的解釋，我喜歡用下面的話來形容：「對我們所謂現實描述之外的另一世界給予知覺上的回應。」（《巫士唐望的世界》pp. 45-50）
所以為什麼巫士做夢當中可以「看見」能量，因為也是先停頓夢世界，才能「看見」。我們沒辦法簡要摘唐望的「停頓世界」，因為佔本書第一部，從 p. 54 到 p. 345，還不是一章而已，，而是幾乎整本書的內容。有個部分有點意思，第二部「前往伊斯特蘭的旅程」，第二章也叫「停頓世界」，當中提到在巫士的世界生物都會說話，我最近越來越多夢跟動物說話。
「而昨天，世界變成了巫師告訴你的世界，」他繼續說：「在那個世界裏，狼會說話，鹿也會說話，就像以前我告訴過你的，響尾蛇、樹木，及其他生物也都會說話，但是我要你去學的是看見。也許你現在知道了，看見只發生在你偷偷潜行於兩個世界之間時——平常人的世界和巫師的世界之間。你現在正是夾在兩個世界的中點。昨天你相信小狼對你說話，隨便一個巫師即使不會看見，也會相信這件事，但是能看見的人都知道，相信此事就是被限定在巫師的圈子裏。同樣的道理，不相信狼會說話，就是被限定在平常人的圈子裏。」
「你的意思是，平常人的世界和巫師的世界都不是真實的?」
「它們都是真實的世界，都能對你發生作用。例如說，你可以問那隻小狼任何你想知道的事，牠也必須要回答你。唯一不幸的地方是，狼並不可靠，牠們愛玩弄把戲。你的命運注定沒有可靠的動物友伴。」（《巫士唐望的世界》p. 373）
其實這些異想世界說的是其他世界的事，我一直有兩位動物隨行，經常夢到牠們，有時候是貓有時候是狗，有部電影說到人類的守護靈動物，兩者是不可分的，強行分割手術會人會喪失靈魂，電影把守護靈當成本尊——本體，本體在人體外面而且不可以離超過幾公尺，這有點誇張且擬動物化，唐望巫士是發現明晰球體並不重合在我們肉體一起，而是在外面繃繃彈跳，或者也差不多同樣意思。我想是存在層面的不同以致於在視覺上彷彿分開來看吧。就跟半夢半醒時我們也處於現實世界與夢世界的中間點上，兩邊都接觸得到，但沒有重合為一。
「我還要再告訴你一件事，」他笑著說：「現在這很重要。那一天，哲那羅並沒有把你的車子從平常人的世界中移走。他只是逼著你像巫士般去看世界，而你的車子並不在那個世界裏，哲那羅要軟化你的確信，他的小丑式的表演告訴你的身體，想去理解一切，這個想法有多荒謬。而在他放風箏時，你幾乎看見了。當你找到車子時，你是同時在兩個世界中。那天我們幾乎笑破肚皮，是因爲你真的以爲你在那地方找到了車子，並從那裏開車送我們回來。」
「但是他怎麽能逼我像巫士般去看世界呢?」
「我與他在一起，我們都知道那個世界。一旦人知道那個世界之後，要使它發生，只需去使用另一個力量之環，我告訴過你巫士都有的。哲那羅要這麽做真是易如反掌。他讓你忙著翻石頭，好分散你的思想，讓你的身體看見。」
我告訴他，這三天來所發生的事，已經使我對世界的看法遭受不可彌補的破壞。我說過我們過去10年的交往都沒有如此震撼，就像是服用知覺轉變性植物的經驗也沒有如此强烈。
「力量植物只不過是輔助，」唐望說，「當身體明白它能看見時，才是真實的。只有在那時候，人才能明白我們每天所看到的世界，只不過是一種描述。我一直就是要你明白這一點。可惜的是，你只剩下些許時間，同盟就要來抓住你了。」
「同盟非抓住我不可嗎?」
「沒有辦法逃避。爲了能看見，一個人必須要學習巫士看世界的方式，然後同盟就會被召喚，一旦被召喚，它就會出現。」
「你不能教我看見而不召喚同盟嗎?」
「不能，爲了要看見，必須要學習用另一種方式來看世界。而我所知道的另一種方式，就是巫士的方式。」（pp. 375-376）
唐望說他們不是巫師，這本大陸電子版都寫巫師，人家是巫士。
2009/02/21 Sat, cloudy/sunny, indoor 20.3°C 《日與夜的循環》：All phenomena are present in luminous clarity
如同上面所講小狼根本不是一隻狼，而是一個神奇的生物；我夢中的貓啊狗的
搞不好也是神奇的生物。下午說到將 passion 轉為有用的面向，但如何利用 passions 於修道上呢？南開諾布說：Without categorizing phenomena as either good or bad, we find them present in the state of the real condition of existence. This is what is usually meant by "of a single taste." Because all of them are present in total awareness without there being any conceptualization with regard to them, we recognize the passion of delusion it self as being nothing other than nondiscursiveness. (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 91)
基於不做判斷與受自己概念所影響，這聽起來就像是唐望講的「不做」，只是藏密沒有講到好像突然轉換視覺進入異想世界世界一樣，這裡只是說：「All phenomena manifest as the real condition of existence just as it is in itself.」；「All phenomena which present themselves as objects to the six aggregates are present in luminous clarity and lacking in any inherent nature.」（p. 91）感覺起來佛法有點哲學，唐望比較少這樣說事情。上面第二句，有個重點：present in luminous clarity，藏密老師都不舉實例，可能習慣上不便說明自己的修行火候，因此大部分佛法書看起來都在講哲學，缺乏實際應用及成效（個人案例）描述，所以我們只好回唐望傳承找大嘴巴「卡卡」（大陸都暱稱卡羅斯•卡斯塔尼達為「卡卡」）。
小狼的確說話了，它傳達了思想，而這種傳達就像是它說了一個句子似的。我說：「你好嗎，小狼？」我覺得我聽到它回答：「我很好，你呢？」然後小狼又重複了一遍，我跳了起來，它却一動也不動，它根本沒有因我的突然跳起而受驚嚇。它的眼神仍然明亮友善。它趴在地上，側著頭問我：「你爲什麼害怕？」我坐下來面對它，開始一次最不可思議的對話，最後它問我，我在這裏做什麼，我說我在這裏「停頓世界」。小狼說：「Quebueno！」(真棒！)。然後這整件事的不可思議擊中了我，我的頭腦一片激蕩，突然間這隻動物全身發亮，煥發出七彩虹光。小狼變成一個流動、透明發亮的動物，它的光很刺眼，我想用手蒙住眼睛，但是無法動彈。這通體發亮的動物碰觸到我內在未知的部位，我的身體感受到難以言喻的溫暖和愉悅，仿佛它這一碰使我爆炸了。我麻木地站在那裏，感覺不出我的脚、我的腿，還有身體其他部分，但是有某種東西支撑著我不倒。
我不知道我在那裏待了多久。在這期間，我沒有思想或感覺，一切都消失隱退了，唯獨我自由地飄浮在空間中。突然我覺得有火在燃燒我，才發覺太陽已經快碰到地平線了，我正視著太陽，於是看到了「世界的聯線」。我確實看到了無數奇特發光的白線，交錯於四周一切事物上，交叠或穿過周圍的每一件事物。我轉過身來察看這個驚人的新世界。
整個事情可能只有幾分鐘，但在我却是無盡期之久。我覺得有種溫暖而安詳的東西從世界裏流出，從我自己體內流出。我知道我發現了一個秘密。這秘密非常簡單，我體驗到一種無名的感覺洪流。我這一生中從未感到如此神妙的歡悅，如此的平靜，如此龐大的掌握，但我無法把發現的秘密用言語表達出來，甚至也無法把它擺進思想時，只有我的身體知道這秘密。（《巫士唐望的世界》pp. 369-371）
剛剛我抄到一則夢錄音，提到夢中意識完全知悉但醒時意識想不起來的窘境。王靜蓉在講課時爭對學員提說記不得她所講，她也說「你身體記得」。唐望說法是能量體記得，能量體是超大記憶硬碟。
However, we should not think that these two (the Dharmata 法性 and Rigpa 本覺) are ultimately distinct and separate. If such were the case, integration would not be possible. But we do not remain at this level of distinguishing external as against internal. This realization of their inseparability gives rise to a manifestation of great bliss of Mahasukha, which is nondual in nature. (The Cycle of Day and Night, pp. 91-92)
「And because it has the nature of Energy or compassion, ....This is how the passions can be utilized on the path.」（p. 92）這裡 it 指的是 great bliss of Mahasukha，不知道 Mahasukha 是什麼，maha 是大，可能也是某種「世界的連線」吧。不過到目前為止，我都沒有經歷過至樂的洪流，有洪流（麻花狀能量波紋或量子湯）但沒有至樂，我是冷血女巫士。
南開諾布上面談及慈悲（compassion）稱之為 Energy，是用來利益眾生，「The individual has three levels of existence in terms of the functioning of his body, speech (or energy), and mind.」（p. 92）這樣的個人可以在三種存在層面利益廣大的眾生，三種層面又叫三身，身是 dimension 次元的意思：化身代表一個人的物質次元或者身體；報身代表一個人能量的微細次元；法身則代表真正的存在次元（大寫 the Dimension of Existence）及其本具本初覺知（inherent Primordial Awareness）。一個成就的人才能同時感知自己的（大寫）真實存在，以及在其他次元的示現，一切本然如是。
所以我也開始覺得我入睡後仍然存在著，所以我不肯放棄抄夢是這樣，就好像《蝴蝶效應》的男主角每換一個身份記憶體就倍增，每一個次元的生存都有其記憶，所以我有兩份記憶：醒時與夢時，雖然我是宅女，可夢裡很少在家裡。
It is simply the case that what was inherent from the very beginning has now manifested, just as the sun appears in the sky when the clouds dissipate. This is what is meant by "clarity". (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 93)
因此所謂某些夢乃明體所現，是我特別放鬆進入法性體驗時，放鬆意味沒有業力軌跡及思想障蔽時，明體就能放射其光芒，配合上其他因緣綜合展現了夢境。大概是這意思吧，當然是我自己的明體，但跟他人也沒有分別。最後結論：
Then, at the conclusion, one must dedicate any merit accumulated by the action to the benefit of other beings. Here, a little of the essential nectar of the teaching of the Master Garab Dorje has been presented with the wish that all who will have contact with it will come to realize for themselves the state of Samantabhadra, the primordial state of the individual. (The Cycle of Day and Night, p. 93-94)
全書摘畢。
2004/02/1
2009/02/22 Sun, sunny, indoor 23.3°C 《The Supreme Source》：心部是大圓滿的基礎
《The Supreme Source》主要在介紹大圓滿的心部（Semde），本書包含三部分：第一部份來自毘（ㄆㄧˊ）盧遮那是（Vairocana）的譯作；第二部分才是南開諾布的教授；第三部分也是譯作。因此我們集中第二部分來閱讀，否則書這麼厚，會進度非常慢。
在本書序文中說，心部（藏音 Kunjed Gyalpo）是大圓滿的基礎，「Its aim is to awaken each individual to his or her true nature: the primordial state of enlightenment, which can be compared to a mirror on whose surface the nultiplicity of the phenomena of existence is reflected.」這裡還說，「Introducing this knowledge is the teacher's task, while understanding it deeply and integrating it inot one's existence is the disciple's task: only when this has been accomplished do the traditional texts becoming living words, precious pointers along the timeless journey towards the supreme souce.」（p. 9）
所以，我們直接從 p. 75 Part Two: An Introduction to the Kunjed Gyalpo 開始。在進入英文文本之前，先要熟悉一下中文用詞。竹慶本樂仁波切在《狂野的覺醒：大手印與大圓滿之旅》最後十分之一篇幅才進入大圓滿，他說：「進入禁戒明覺乘之後，我們才真正踏入了金剛乘修持道。就九乘佛道的角度來看，有所謂的外三密續和內三密續，外三密續即是禁戒明覺稱的修持：事部密續、行部密續以及瑜伽部密續；內三密也就是所謂的卓千大圓滿。」（p. 303）心部屬於第九乘阿底瑜伽三部之一：
阿底瑜伽可再細分為三個部分：心部（Semde，先底，心識部）、界部（Longde，龍底，法界部或出世法界部）、口訣部（Menngakde，緬雅底，口訣部或深密口訣部）。第一個名相的 Sem 即是「心」的意思，第二個名相 Long 則是虛空或空間，而第三個詞彙 Mennga 則是口訣；透過詳盡的瑜伽修持步驟以及上師的口訣，我們於是進入本初佛的虛空之中，不過我們必須學習當一個勇敢的人，學會如何裸裎相見，我們必須要有很大的勇氣才能揭露自身的根本覺性。（《狂野的覺醒》p. 320）
所以我們沒有時間瞎混了，就像是最後決戰，要或不要就是當刻的事。我們其中一個掉頭走了，就永遠失去任何機會了。這樣是不是很過癮哪？所以我們還是把自己準備好，具足相當的信心與勇氣，take one is to take all，要者全拿。
在接到一通驚天動地的「起床電話」之後，我們終於進入了這個最後階段，而這通起床電話就是所謂的「覺性灌頂」（Empowerment of Rigpa），這個覺性灌頂就是最後的呼喚，它讓我們從此告別夢境。（《狂野的覺醒》p. 320）
帥啊！請進入挑戰者寶座。
2009/02/23 Mon, sunny/cloudy, indoor 24.8°C 《The Supreme Source》：inserted the energy of his or her wisdom
今天終於要切入《The Supreme Source》，雖然我沒看幾頁。在外瑜伽裡有三個密續，事密、行密、瑜伽密，基本上我們稍稍瞭解就好，以前在摘《九乘次第論集》已經講過了，這裡僅摘列一些比較清楚的說明。譬如南開諾布講到本尊觀想：
The kriya tantra 事密 teachings hinge on the concept of the "deity,"本尊 but certainly not in the sense of a single creator-god. What, then, is meant by "deity"? A deity is a being who has accomplished realization 證悟 through this same path. So, all realized beings can manifest in the form of a deity and the deity itself is deemed to be the main means of realization for practitioners, whose task is to prepare themselves to receive that deity's wisdom. (The Supreme Source, p. 77)
外密續是本尊是一位自外於自己的已證悟的存有，吸收他的智慧；內密續則視本尊為自己佛性的顯現，是自己的本性／自性，這是基本差異。按事密所說，行者如何準備自身好接受本尊智慧呢？南開諾布說：「First of all by considering that realized beings are present everywhere and at all time.」（p. 78）他說本尊的出現（present）不是我們眼見為信的「東西」，已證悟的生靈時空的限制，只要我們適當地準備好，接受其智慧不是問題。
我在想我們想要修大圓滿的也還是得從基礎班上起，意思是說九乘按部就班修上來，就事密來說，「practitioners have to devote themselves to the purification of body, voice, and mind.」（p. 79）身語意的淨化整天在說：
In terms of the body, it is necessary to perform "prostrations," visualizing the realized beings in front of one-self, or to do physical and breathing exercise.
In terms of the voice, it is necessary to recite specific mantras for purification and for the development of clarity while maintaining mental concentration. (The Supreme Source, p. 79)
南開諾布解釋咒語不是普通的字句，「it was pronounced by a realized being that in a certain sense inserted the energy of his or her wisdom into it. Thus, the power of the mantra resides in the sound vibration and not in the written letter: by pronouncing a deity's mantra correctly one is connected with the wisdom of that specific deity.」因此不同種類的咒語有不同的功用（p. 79）。身跟語（能量）說了，沒講到「意」？
Finally, as regards the aspect of the mind, the fundamental point of the kriya tantras is to focus one's concentration on the realized beings, to receive their wisdom and to awaken. Thus one visualizes the "deity" forms of realized beings, selecting one in particular that becomes the symbol representing the wisdom of all the enlightened ones. (The Supreme Source, p. 79)
意思可能像宗薩仁波切說的比較簡單，只要認為他真的就在那裡就夠了，然後我們接受他的智慧加持或連結。本節結論：
In general there are three fundamental points in all tantric practice (and not only of the kriya tantras): mudra 手印或手勢, mantra 咒語, and visualization 觀想, linked respectively with the body, voice, and mind. Mudras are hand gestures with diverse functions: tendering offerings such as flowers, perfume, silk clothes, etc., invoking the power of the deity and absorbing it into oneself, and so on. The simultaneous use of mudra, mantra, and visualization is extremely effective and can markedly increase the practitioners' capacity to enter into contact with the visualized deity. (The Supreme Source, p. 79)
我們沒有教手勢。
2009/02/25 Wed, sunny, indoor 25.3°C 《The Supreme Source》：essence、nature、energy 三種智慧
《The Supreme Source》，所謂父續或母續跟我想的不一樣。在 higher tantras 中分父續、母續、不二續，其實分別跟 lunar-masculine force (corresponding to the aspect of method)、solar-feminine force (corresponding to the aspect of prajna 空性 or energy)及兩者平衡的 non-dual。簡言之，父續跟跟明性（clarity）及物質顯現（material level of manifestation）有關；母續則跟空性與能量——存在的潛力——有關。
或者說父續為生起次第；母續為圓滿次第。但我比較有興趣的是，基於空性與能量（顯現潛力，說的就是隱含秩序層的事），母續。含那洛六法。所以我傾向母續是這意思。
The mother tantras are mainly concerned with the completion phase, or dzogrim, that consists in re-absorbing or integrating the pure mandala dimension within one's "subtle" body composed of the channels, prana 氣, and vital essence. For this reason, the breathing methods and those of concentration on the charkas 脈輪 and channels 氣脈 are indispensable, together with perfect mastery of the kundalini 拙火 energy. In fact, the famous teachings known in the modern tradition as the "Six Yogas of Naropa" belong to dzogrim. (p. 83)
對大圓滿來說，透過三樣基本觀點來闡釋：基、道、果，也就是三種智慧：essence、nature、energy。南開諾布經常以鏡子來說明這三樣特性，鏡子本質、反射特性、鏡中影。我們今晚簡單摘完這三樣東西就好：
Essence：說的是 mind，思想由心生，由於找不出思想的出處、停留處與消失處，所以說心性本空。「We find there is nothing, which is why the essence is said to be emptiness.」（p. 85）
The concept of emptiness, or sunyata, is very widespread in Mahayana Buddhism. However the fundamental point to understand is that emptiness is the true essence of material phenomena. (p. 85)
Clarity：念頭接連不斷地顯現，「Their essence is emptiness, nevertheless they manifest ceaselessly. The same applies to our senses: all the objects we perceive are ceaseless appearing of our karmic vision. Thus, then, is the nature of clarity.」（p. 76）
Energy：活動且不中斷的功用（active and uninterrupted function），「We think something and then e follow this thought and enter into action.」（p. 86）所以能量意味 to produce something，無論是有形的動作或無形的想像、can be pure or impure。
2009/02/28 Sat, sunny/cloudy/raining, indoor 21.6°C 《The Supreme Source》：All that necessary is to relax
但是我是要練本覺的，上次《狂野的覺醒》上師直指心性，或喚起本覺，就好像接到一通 morning call，把我們從睡夢中叫醒，不好意思這本書到此摘完了，所以有講到什麼大圓滿嗎？好像也沒有。
代表九乘之顛的大圓滿就是阿底瑜伽（Atiyoga），對於我們這樣的初學者，僅僅是時時刻刻保持警覺都不容易。「With atiyoga, we reach the culmination of the path of realization: Dzogchen, or "total perfection," whose characteristic path, being based on the knowledge of self-liberation, does not entail any more transformation.」（p. 84）事實上南開諾布說的是「release of tension」、「leaving as it is」，放鬆於禪定狀態，即當下圓滿。
資深佛友也說我放鬆的時候比較好，也就是比較有智慧；反過來說，緊張對我是不好的，比較笨。「All that is necessary to enter into the state of contemplation is to relax.」（p. 84）以前看催眠老師，他還要同學帶我去 spa，他說我不懂什麼叫放鬆。聽說做愛可以一層一層鬆開許多脈結，瑜伽士修雙修就是利用這個放鬆，不是為了什麼身體的愉悅，因為最終要完全打開的是中脈好直達頂輪體驗大樂 。
When we follow the Dzogchen teaching, if we have sufficient capacity, we can start directly with the practice of contemplation. The only really indispensable thing is practice of guru yoga or "unification with the state of the teacher," because it is from the teacher that we receive the direct introduction to knowledge. (The Supreme Source, p. 84)
看來
上師說的沒錯，要修大圓滿，光靠一個上師瑜伽就夠了。以前武俠片主角受傷，另一人幫他背後氣功治療，然後全數武功就傳過去了，真是省事啊。南開諾布還說大圓滿沒有密法的十項必修（Dzogchen is the absence of the ten requisites of the practice of Tantra），例如灌頂、咒語、曼達、觀想等等，「all that is necessary is to discover that the real condition and to remain relaxed in the state.」瞭解這一點很重要。（p. 84）
之前摘過大圓滿基道果有三種智慧：本質、本性、能量，essence 翻本質也不對，在《淨治明相》裡說的是本始基，南開諾布用鏡子來比喻，essence 就是鏡子本身，或像天空本身，是一種法身的概念。因為講到父續的明性跟能量有關，也就是跟顯現；母續講的是空性，跟潛藏力有關。講到能量或能量的潛力，可以分兩方面來說，外在的與內在的。
Externally
This "mode of manifestation" of energy, in which the reflection manifests externally, is called tsal in Tibetan. Impure vision tied to karma and to the material dimension and pure vision at the level of subject and object are both tsal manifestations of energy.
Internally
There is also a way in which energy manifests "internally," in the subject itself, in the same way that images are reflected in a mirror; this is called rolpa.
Basic condition
The third way energy manifests is called dang, and represents somewhat the basic condition of energy, its potentiality to take on any form according to circumstances. (The Supreme Source, pp. 86-87)
不好意思，我不知道上段能量在講什麼：外在顯現是業力所致；內在觀想也可變得 concrete；第三種則隨環境條件自然顯現。大概是這樣的意思。有人問無始之始或輪迴開始在何時，回答說起一念便墮二元。凡事不判斷比較好。
Of course we can stay in peace doing nothing as long as we are not distracted. But if it is otherwise, it means we are slaves to dualism, conditioned by the object. In this case it is not enough to think that we have the essence, nature, and energy: conditioning by dualistic vision is precisely the obstacle that we need to overcome in order to allow the sun of the primordial state to shine again. (The Supreme Source, p. 87)
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